
My son married the most incredible woman last Fall and while the nuptial mass and reception were jam-packed with friends, family, tradition, music, laughs and love, I had a calm about me all day. This calm I attribute to my new daughter-in-law’s deceased mother.
This is the communion of saints at its best. I had never met Ann, but feel as if she would have been a dear friend. Ann died from breast cancer leaving her husband and four children ages 14 to 7. My new daughter-in-law was the 14 year old, the eldest of four. You know the kind of person Ann was by the fruits she left behind. Her husband is a devoted father and a few years after Ann’s death, he married a woman who is strong, beautiful and supportive of Ann’s children. Ann’s children are all adults now and some of the most wonderful people you could ever meet. The bond of these siblings is unbreakable and my son is blessed to now be their brother.
So, why did I feel this calm amongst the commotion of wedding day? Besides the obvious facts of a well-organized day, this bride’s mother was there – spiritually close. All one had to do was look a little and they would find Ann was there. She was like a dear friend, quietly present, watching over things from the side with a huge smile for you each time you glanced her way. Where did I see her? Well, here are a few places she showed up with the smile.
She was in the Priest.
The Celebrant for the nuptial mass happened to be the very same priest who was assigned to Ann’s family’s parish in a town 50 miles away when she was ill and her children were small. He was very familiar with this family – even though he had not seen them in a number of years. He knew their story, their loss and now the little 14 year olds joy.
She was in an exchange of gifts.
The bride and groom exchanged watches as a wedding gift to each other. The bride’s father remembered that he and Ann had also exchanged watches as their gifts to each other on their wedding day.
She was in the face of her twin sister.
Ann has an identical twin sister who was the Mistress of Ceremonies for the day. She has been a constant source of love and support for her sister’s four children and her presence on this day was irreplaceable as she poured out the love of her sister in hugs, kisses, laughter and mementos.
She was in the mementos.
Ann’s twin sister saved a few cherished religious articles that she gave to the bride to wear or carry. She had a rosary and a few pins, like Ann’s first communion pin and a St. Christopher pin. Ann prayed her rosary and wore these pins often.
She was in a pair of earrings.
The bride’s father and step-mother gave to the bride a pair of diamond earrings made from an anniversary ring of Ann’s.
These are five small places that I saw Ann that day, but the most obvious reminder was a photograph of Ann on her wedding day.
It was placed at the side of the altar at the feet of a statue of Mary. “Appropriate”, said her twin sister. “She had a strong faith and a great devotion to the Blessed Virgin Mary.”
I started thinking about this statement. When you are a mother, close to the mother of Jesus, and you know you will be leaving young children soon, wouldn’t you ask Mary to watch over your children? Of course you would! I am confident that Ann placed her husband, his future wife and her four children in the arms of Mary before she departed. Last Saturday, Ann hung out with Mary during the nuptials and watched over her baby girl becoming one with the love of her life.
I hope you enjoyed yourself, Ann! I know I sure did.