I Don't Have a Dad

Lent presents a treasure trove of wonderful opportunities to think and reflect on what exactly we’re doing here on earth.
Darlene*, my massage therapist, recently shared a story, that illustrates my point. We were catching up as I hadn’t seen her in a few months and she revealed that she needed some liquid courage to get through Christmas with her estranged stepmother-in-law. The woman had walked out on her marriage, yet Darlene’s father-in-law welcomed her back just for the sake of the holiday. It seemed obvious that he was still in love with her and extended the olive branch in the hopes of reconciliation. But, the woman decided to stir up some drama and brought her boyfriend! Darlene said it was a very awkward scene as the dining room was occupied by two opposing camps. Everyone was supposed to act like everything was okay.
I couldn’t believe I was hearing such absurdity, but this was Darlene’s reality, not a soap opera. I was so saddened for her that the holiday left a memorable but distasteful mark. I was also sad because I saw the many levels of repentance and forgiveness that needed to be extended in this situation but probably wouldn’t be for a very long time to come. The complication would keep that family from healing and moving forward. When we make life more complicated than it needs to be, we miss out on a lot.
In the larger sense, we all have something that stands in the way of our progress whether or not we want to admit it. We complicate simple things because of pride, selfishness and stubbornness. We make mountains out of molehills in an effort to prove that we’re right, we’re important and our needs are greater. We attract drama when we forget that God never meant for our lives to be so complex. We fill ourselves up with so much nothingness that there is no room for God. The over-saturation of reality and shock TV programs is proof enough that our Andy Warhol-inspired “15 minutes of fame” have gone on for too long. We want everyone to look at us.
God wants us to look at Him.
Jesus doesn’t ask us for much. I like to think that He wants us to follow the ol’ adage “K.I.S.S.” – Keep It Simple, Sweetheart.
“Come, follow me,” he simply instructs the rich young man who wanted to know how to gain eternal life. (Matthew 19:21, NAB). But the fool had to complicate things by thinking about all he’d have to give up – riches, fame, fortune. He refused to die to himself. He didn’t realize that the riches God offers far outweigh anything we could get here on earth.
Jesus gently chastised Martha who was so preoccupied with busy work that she was missing out on the most important work of all – how to be the best disciple of Christ. (Luke 10:41-42, NAB)
Somehow, through God’s grace no doubt, the Apostles Peter and Andrew understood K.I.S.S. In Matthew 4:19, when Jesus said, “Come…and I will make you fishers of men,” they dropped everything, fishing nets and all, and immediately followed. Peter even left behind his family to follow someone he didn’t know. What courage and trust!
While God is not calling us to abandon our families, He is calling us to something greater. I’ve written about this before, but I can’t stress it enough. To gain the greater, we must lose the lesser - ourselves. We must die to ourselves. We must give ourselves up. God cannot work through us if we are filled with drama, petty complications, unforgiveness, negativity, and misplaced priorities.
Can you K.I.S.S.? Will you try to do just that this Lenten season? Jesus is softly whispering to you, “Come. Follow me. Keep It Simple, Sweetheart.” If you do that, then everything else will flow from there.
* - Name changed.