The Necessity of Regular Confession and Dependence on God's Mercy

Confession is something that boggles the minds of many. Often the question comes up, “If we can confess our sins directly to God, then what need have we for Confession, for the Sacrament of Reconciliation?” – the question is not only asked by Protestants, but Catholics also.

Let’s take a look at a few things. Firstly, what are the five names for Confession?

1. Confession (or the Sacrament of Confession)

2. The Sacrament of Reconciliation (probably the most often used name)

3. The Sacrament of Penance

4. The Sacrament of Forgiveness

5. The Sacrament of Conversion

Why do we have these five different names for the same thing? Here are some reasons, though they are not extensive.

1. We confess our sins to God. We name them and say how many times we committed each sin. In doing so, we acknowledge our human weaknesses and that we are in need of growing, learning, and correcting our faults, as well as our need for God’s mercy. In a sense, we confess that Jesus is Lord, and thus we must go through Him to receive forgiveness from the Father [God]. We confess that we are totally dependent on God and that we need His mercy.

2. We reconcile ourselves to God. Every Ash Wednesday, we here this line in the second reading – “Be reconciled to God” (2 Cor 5:20). By reconciling ourselves to God, we become one with Him again, ready to respond to His call for us – the Call of holiness, but also of LOVE.

3. We do penance. Many people see this as a punishment, when in fact, it is designed to help us reflect and learn from our sins, so as not to commit them again, by the help of God’s grace. Penance is part of the conversion process to obtain pardon and make satisfaction for the act against charity to which we have committed [the sin itself]. Thus, it reconciles us with the Church and God.

4. We are forgiven by God. When the priest, who comes in persona Christi [in the person of Christ] gives us absolution, we, the penitents, are granted forgiveness, pardon and peace of Christ.

5. The Sacrament should bring about a firm resolve, by the help of God’s grace, not to sin again and to avoid the near occasion of sin, and hence, there should be an element of conversion. If the penitent is not truly sorry for their sins and won’t at least try to stop their bad habits or sins, then they have not made a true resolve and can be refused absolution, since there was not an element of the conversion of heart. By conversion, one must have a contrite heart, and trusting in God’s mercy, allow His mercy to overflow from head to heart – believing that they are really forgiven – as the Greeks used the term, metanoia.

So, what is the actual purpose of Confession? Why do we need to go to a priest instead of “directly to God”?

If God is everywhere, then why would we need the sacraments? Why do we need the real presence of the Eucharist, consecrated in the Mass? Why do we need physical signs in the sacraments when God is always with us? These are questions asked a lot by many who seem to think the Catholic Church man-made the sacraments. Since we are both body and soul, we need to experience God in both the physical dimension [body] and spiritual dimension [soul].

There’s a very Catholic saying that goes like this, “what the body does, the soul will follow”. Being human, we need to be able to experience things through our senses to truly allow them to seep through into our hearts. The reason we have confession is partly linked to this.

For the Eucharist, though we know God is everywhere, the sacrament allows us to see, touch, taste Jesus. It serves as an objective reminder that God is here and present in our lives. In the case of confession, our human nature means we struggle to believe we are truly loved and forgiven. My parish priest of my home parish once said to us that the greatest act we will ever do is to accept we are accepted and forgiven. As Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden hid from God, ashamed of having eaten the forbidden fruit, they showed that humans struggle with a very real battle in believing that God is loving and merciful, and so their reaction was one of fear and distrust in God’s mercy.

So, what does the Sacrament of Confession even do for us?

It allows us to experience, first hand, God’s mercy. When we approach the Sacrament of Confession, we are liberated by the ability to see the priest, hear him, allow the words of his giving of absolution under the authority of the Church to heal us, by letting them help us draw the line of the past in the sand and let the waves of the ocean of God’s mercy wash away our sin. We can hear the priest telling us, “you’re forgiven”. Just as Jesus said in the curing of the paralytic, “which of these is easier to say, “Your sins are forgiven” or “Get up and walk”?” (Mt 9:5). By allowing ourselves to hear these very healing words, we can overcome our otherwise too weak human selves, that would otherwise just keep questioning whether God really loves us or has forgiven us.

Moreover, the practice of ritual is part of lives. For example, imagine a young man proposing to the girl of his dreams. What would make more of an impact? Walking up to her and saying, “I love you, marry me”, or getting down on one knee, with a bouquet of flowers, smiling and saying, “My dearly beloved girlfriend, I love you so much, will you be mine forever and marry me?”. Of course, the second one would make a much greater impact – it goes without saying. So, in the same way, confession is just God’s gesture to us, to hold us and embrace us as His beloved, and show us His love for us in a very physical and spiritual way, to appeal to the body and soul that we are. If we do not let ourselves be embraced in this way, we stuff away the negativity of our imaginations, that eventually manifests and transmits itself across to others, especially those closest to us, to whom we love the most. What is not transformed is transmitted. If our darkness can be transformed by God’s mercy in the Sacrament of Confession, we are in a much better position to radiate God’s light, joy and love to others. Therefore, confession is a gift from God, to touch us, heal us and liberate us. By going to confession, we admit that we need God’s grace and mercy, and we learn humility, since we recognise that we are totally dependent on God, and in need of His love, mercy and compassion.

A Personal Anecdote

I’m a convert to the Catholic faith and made my first Confession at the age of 18. By that time, sin was weighing heavy upon me, and the sins of my childhood, some great and many in number, were burdening me, and there was a part of me that doubted God’s love for me. I struggled even through the RCIA to accept that God could use me for His greater glory and bless me with all that I had. Everything I asked of him, I was given more than an abundance, more than my teenage imagination could possibly comprehend. But I found it difficult to accept God’s mercy, His forgiveness, because I couldn’t forgive myself. I couldn’t forgive myself for hurting people in the past, and for all the possible things I might do in the future (as the priest who later became my regular confessor later on said to me, “don’t be caught up with the Theology of the Possibles, which by the way, isn’t a Theology!!”). I struggled to believe that God could forgive me if I couldn’t even forgive myself, but how wrong I was. After 40 minutes, yes, it was 40 minutes, I came out of the confessional for the first time, having had my sins washed clean. Finally, I was free. Everything seemed brighter. I felt as it if someone took a screen away from my eyes. I could see things so clearly, and it was beautiful. After I did my penance, I just sat on a bench at the back of the church and I looked up at the stained glass window and sunbathed in the presence of God.

Ever since then, I have gone regularly to Confession. Although I’m naturally quite shy and reserved, and often find it incredibly difficult to reveal my deepest heart’s secrets, especially my sins, the sacrament has taught me a great amount of humility. Even though I can be very embarrassed to confess certain sins in particular, I have learned to trust in God’s mercy and compassion, knowing that, as long as I do my best to keep myself from sin, by the help of God’s grace, He will keep me ever close to Him and always forgive me and help me along this very difficult journey we call, “life”.

Thus, I must encourage you to go to Confession with a contrite heart, sorry for your sins, and a sincere and firm purpose of amendment, with the help of God’s grace, to do better and sin no more. Most priests have recommended that once a month is healthy (even though Canon Law requires us to only go annually), and in some cases, especially if you know you’re in deep need of sacramental grace to overcome an “addicted sin” as some have called it (sins you commit over and over again, so deeply rooted that they’ve become bad habits, or worse, actual addictions), then go more often, or any time you commit mortal sin (grave, full knowledge and deliberate consent). For me, I go weekly, though this is not advised unless you have been specifically guided by a priest/your confessor to do so, since there is a risk of scruples (becoming overly obsessed with every little sin, including venial sins, until you fail to trust in God’s mercy, which is not healthy).

God bless you, my dear brothers and sisters in Christ. Know you have my prayers. May you always trust in God’s mercy and compassion, and be not afraid to approach the Sacrament of Confession. Remember, there’s probably nothing the priest hasn’t already heard before, and you probably won’t be the worst sinner he’s had to hear a confession for, so don’t worry. Trust God and depend on His mercy.