Reflection - First Friday - July, 2017

Had another great morning Mass, Benediction and reflection - 1st Friday. Got to thinking about this advice..."Don't do what they do, but do what they tell you." As a Catholic, I've had to answer to this question whenever one of our shepherds seems to be choosing sin. Growing up, I had this notion that all people consecrated through special orders, like priests and sisters, were somehow protected by God and therefore pretty perfect in my eyes.

At one time, I even used their examples of un-Catholic living to excuse my own choices and quite honestly, I became more confused than reactionary before I got rebellious. And I was pretty upset, almost as if I was lied to somehow.

Looking back, I have to admit that I felt this way across all areas of living – employment discrimination, economic standing, false flags for so-called freedom from inhibitions for "love" – meaning lust, or the ‘must be in and have control’ – hence the birth of new rights to combat oppression. Moreover, the search continued for approval from some one thing that was constant. Now, I see little difference in these consequences which are produced by changes from a growing Godless world – they still produce chaos, violence and wars. I don't react as some do with change...that's just me; however, I know now that I'm not alone in that either. As a matter of fact, this happens to be the one constant entity that has kept me searching for truth. With that comes learning and with God at the helm, confusion can only develop into peace. Ah…the heart of a child.

I love children. One of their qualities is their questioning as they discover the newness whence they grow. I did not know this as a child because no child really does - the meaning of what it is to remain as children in heart. At some point we make that choice because in order to remain with the love that children express, we need to learn how to find those answers to our questions. As we develop in knowledge, experience, mistakes and lessons learned - it becomes a matter of choice, which is with us from the moment our rational minds have enough memory built up with which to process along guidelines we were given and a lot of them, the examples as well.

So, it's pretty normal for us to grow not only listening, but watching. A very scary part of parenting is this powerful example. "Don't do what I do, do what I tell you," works until about that same age when biological and social development reach higher levels of thinking. And, it also correlates to when growth spurts in ALL areas of development come rushing at and through us, leaving some of us totally vulnerable like a wedge being used to split two very strong properties such as interdependence and separation. Yikes, for some of us this lasts a very long time. It is also at this precise time that we need the best guidance, exemplary example and a great deal of attention. Of course, we don’t know this, and as a matter of fact will often rebel against it – even vehemently. The world around us becomes so important that we can readily substitute those elements of questioning and approval in our beginnings in higher thinking and follow who or whatever seems to be speaking the loudest or offering easy-to-do answers. When we haven’t nurtured a discipline or established discernment for what is good or bad, we also become extremely vulnerable to what is popular. Hence, we can develop the mantra, “Got to go with the flow.”  We can also fall readily into seeking that attention and approval from elements unworthy for such tasks, and which advocate for choices that bring even more chaos.

As a parent I cannot tell you how many times my children have said to me: “Mom, it’s the 90’s!”.  Having been blessed with making better choices during my parent stage, my response was simple. “Yes, this is true and what does doing the right thing have to do with the year?”  So, how in the world did I get to this point? How was I able to take what the world offered me and somehow learn that if I constantly chose the world, my life would remain in anxious flux, continual chaos and the road I was on years before would lead me toward oblivion?  God’s ways are truly amazing and at this point in the continuum of learning, I know that I will never understand fully – and that’s okay. As a matter of fact, it’s more than okay, it’s why I am alive today.

Yes, our shepherds will make mistakes, some of their actions will be devastating for their souls and the pain and suffering they will have dolled to all of God’s creatures will be simply unacceptable in His eyes. Forgiveness is always available; however the wounds from sin can last a lifetime.  I have learned to listen better, “…the gates of hell will not prevail against it” (speaking of the Church, which is the Body of Christ). I learned also that to have the heart of a child means to keep questioning with that innocence in the search for truth. It means going to our parent, in this case, God, and asking; remembering His words (‘… Do not be afraid … and … My yoke is not heavy and My burden is light…’)   

We hear a lot of ‘Back to Basics’…well, part of growing wiser is knowing that no matter what is going on, being said, being done all around us, there is a ‘constant’ to which we can always depend upon for answers. To be childlike also includes that we are not always going to like the answer. Hopefully, we have used those blessings from God, and in developing higher thinking, we come to know the difference from making choices in what we see and the confusing ones the world offers to those which we were told… “Do what I tell you.” Hopefully, we have learned that those are Jesus’ words and His is the only example we need to see. He is also God and our imperfections will not always reflect His example, but all we have to do is listen and try as best as we can to follow (obey).

So, please, pray for our shepherds. They are bombarded every moment with sins some of us may never experience. Evil is never random. I remember as an adult in Confession the words of the priest, “The devil hits the hardest at those who choose to remain faithful.”  I remember reading lives of our saints who were thrown about physically because they said, “NO” to the evil one. If we only look for consolation for our own trials without consoling the heart that is all loving, we fail to give our hearts to Him, our true Savior and God. We can easily become prey for temptations which could then turn our hearts away from His unconditional love. Let us remember what God Himself promised and trust in Him that His word will be proclaimed through the worst of times and through shepherds who are sinners. We are challenged as true and faithful members of the Body of Christ to remain in trust and hope whether we receive consolation or not. Love endures all, even when it hurts.

Lord, thank you for a wonderful day with You!