Letter from an Ex-Priest (who doesn't have an agenda against the Church)

Almost every morning I enjoy the luxury of listening to my son practice his oboe. Starting at the break of dawn, like a morning prayer—Haydn and Tchaikovsky and some etudes by Barret echo in the winter dark through our house in the woods.
What a gift. His dedication and focus, his picking one small trill that doesn’t sound quite right and working it over, again and again.
I am so very happy that he takes after his mother in the zeal creativity and discipline department. His life will be a little easier because of such qualities.
I was struck today by how important consistency is in the spiritual life. Now, I write completely out of experience in this area, and it isn’t necessarily a positive one. In other words—when it comes to spiritual consistency, I come up short. Maybe that’s why we have the liturgical seasons and fasts and feasts. Otherwise, left to a steady daily balance of occasional prayer, sparked by occasional crisis life moments that bring one to his knees—the spiritual quest would be like driving on a four lane highway at breakneck speed—passing by everything, stopping only long enough to whiff the smells of a rest stop and missing EVERYTHING else.
Malaise can and does occur. Spiritual malaise can have one simply going through the motions of not only prayer, but living. Eventually, such malaise will cause a disconnect between in our faith and in our life.
So what’s the point? 5:00 in the morning. That’s the point. Change things up. Practice the ancient art of vigil. Offer a day of real fasting on bread and water. Maybe write or journal (to coin a 70’s word choice that made a verb from a noun). Read some Scripture. Start it all with Confession. Plan a local pilgrimage to some other Church or place of holiness.
Breaking the malaise involves some sort of action on the soul's part.
I couldn’t wait to get the Christmas decorations down. I confess, I really needed the Kings to show up and lay their gifts before the Christ Child and move on. I just had nothing left. Even with limited family visits...Still I was ready to move to the next season.
I need to change things up. I need to awaken early and practice. I need to reconnect with my Maker.
The Church, in it’s infinite-inspired-wisdom marks our seasons of months and years and lives with times of purgation, fasts, celebrations, and feasts. Unfortunately, it is sometimes difficult to enter into the purgation and fasting when the world and society suggest another avenue. Thus, our feasts and celebrations are only connected to some materialistic hallmark card holiday and not a deeper spiritual reality.
Now, many who know me, or are aware of my story, know also of my affinity to Our Lady of Medugorje. Granted ‘it’ isn’t technically approved by the Holy Roman Church—yet. However, I have witnessed miracle upon miracle throughout the years of people, and souls (some lost) who have entered into the process espoused by the Mother of God at Medjugorje.....Fasting, Prayer, Holy Eucharist, Reconciliation, and Holy Scripture...and live changing healing happens.
Lent is the perfect time to practice the five stones of Medugorje. They aren’t new. They weren’t invented in 1981. They are tried and proven and the fruits speak for themselves. Old Testament prophets, holy women, and mountain men have practiced the spiritual arts of spiritual cleansing. And… the best part is Holy Eucharist and the forgiveness of sins. I mean come on—really? How much more does a soul need?
Lent is a time to practice the invitation. Lent is a time to get up early and pursue your quest. Lent is the time to practice the oboe at five in the morning.
We know not the day or the hour…
Dust off your knees and rosary beads and get busy.
How do you get to Carnegie Hall or Heaven? Practice, my boy, and brothers and sisters in Christ, practice.