(Audio Version here)
Jacinta: Hello and Welcome to Two Hearts True Healing! I am your host Jacinta Wick. With me is Angela Stansell. We have spent the last several articles on desolation and really delving deeply on how to discern, act, resist, and handle desolation. We have discovered what desolation actually is and is not and why it comes and other possible reasons we may feel down like dryness and depression or illness which is in the physical realm. This article we are talking about how to act in consolation. How to become spiritually prepared for the next time we find ourselves in desolation when it inevitably comes. Angela, take it away!
Angela: Rule 10: “Let the one who is in consolation think how he will conduct himself in the desolation which will come after, taking new strength for that time.”
This rule functions somewhat as a review of all the previous rules. Many of the things we do to resist desolation can be done, in a slightly different way, while experiencing consolation. While our emotions and spiritual experiences go back and forth between dry or painful to happy and pleasurable, our thoughts can be much the same throughout all our spiritual states. This is unnatural and takes practice and humility, but it’s a very wise way of doing things. From a psychological perspective, we’re sort of connecting two schemas– one for consolation, and one for desolation. You may remember that one of the things Ignatius encourages the discerning person to do during desolation is to remember what the consolation was like and think that it will return soon. So it’s sort of building a bridge. And we cross the other way as well– in consolation, we don’t want to completely forget desolation as if it’s never going to happen again, but rather we want to remember it, in a healthy way, and prepare for it.
Before going into more detail about how to prepare for desolation while experiencing consolation, it’s important to note that that’s not the primary function of consolation. God can help us advance spiritually in a much faster way through consolation, and so we don’t want to rush ourselves out of it. It’s a time when He gives great gifts, light, and direction. You might be asking, “If more growth is possible during consolation, why does He allow desolation at all?” Because each has its place. While consolation is a time of great growth and light, certain things can only be learned through resisting desolation.
So consolation is a gift, and the first thing we should do, like the opposite of desolation, is simply accept it. Allow it to happen. Welcome it. Enjoy it. Love God in return. Whether it’s a minute or hours. Other spiritual tasks shouldn’t come before simply accepting this gift. It might actually mean not using your prayer time the way you had planned. This is one of those times when God maybe answers a prayer with “I have something better in mind.” You will know when it’s time to move from accepting it to preparing for desolation, as this is what God wants for you. Individuals who have learned how to do this still feel God’s light and joy while they are preparing for the next trial.
So what do we do to prepare. The same things we do in Rule 6. When in consolation, we can pray about it. Petition God for strength and help for the next time of trial. We can meditate on his love and faithfulness. Remember all of what He has done for you. This is also why we don’t want to rush out of consolation, because we want to be able to remember it later. We can also call to mind the fact that the resisting of future desolation will bear fruit. This truth is a bit more palatable when we’re enjoying God’s presence and feeling His love. Accepting the reality and purpose of future desolation in a time of clarity will be helpful when the time comes. I’m sure you can think of a movie or book where the young hero is being tested and experiences the advice and wisdom of the story’s sage echo in his or her memory for one pivotal push of motivation and strength. These stories are meant to be our stories of the spiritual life.
Another thing we can do is call to mind what we have learned and how we have grown in past times of desolation. For this one, developing a habit of writing while you pray can be really helpful, because you can go back and read it when you’re in a different state. Similarly, there is the more long term practice of writing down petitions for a period of months, putting them in a box, and then at some point taking them all out a re-reading them. People recognize then how many of their prayers have been answered, even ones they’ve forgotten about, and even see that it was better for some prayers not to be answered in the way they originally wanted. In this way, we can grow in trust.
We can also resolve not to make any changes regarding prayer or service during the next time of trial. This reminds me of the D.A.R.E. slogan that aims to prepare kids for facing peer pressure when offered drugs: “Just say ‘no’.” In Discernment of Spirits by Fr. Timothy Gallagher, he also suggests calling to mind how it went the last time you did choose to change something in desolation.
Two more. You can call to mind all the rules St. Ignatius gives. There are a number of infographics and helpful summaries for this, if you give it a quick Google search. Lastly, you may start to see certain patterns for which you can do practical things to help yourself. These may be near occasions of sin or patterns of the Enemy exploiting a weakness. Fr. Gallagher lists some examples on p. 136: “Certain places, at certain times of the year, at certain hours of the day, or faced with certain kinds of stresses, …[people] are more readily prone to spiritual desolation.” I have one, myself. There is a certain time of day that I am frequently in a bad mood. I’ve ruled out possible physical causes, and it’s still a mystery to me. I’ve set an alarm on my phone to remind myself of this so that I can do a better job resisting, and it also acts as a kind of particular examen. You can also ask a Christian brother or sister who is serious about their faith to hold you accountable. In fact, we’ll get into that more in a later rule. Remember that while these trials can feel impossible in the moment, God won’t do that to us. He won’t give us spiritual struggles that are impossible to face. He’s always offering His help, and the trials He permits are an invitation to greater holiness!
Now that we’ve covered ways to prepare for desolation while in consolation, we’ll go into the reasons for this and touch on what happens when we don’t prepare. Like many sports, proper balance and mental preparedness prevents an athlete from being knocked off course. It’s the same in the spiritual life. Desolation loses much of its power if we don’t allow ourselves to be surprised by it. Otherwise we may have a reaction similar to this (p. 131): “I have tried to serve you, Lord, the best I am able, and this interior pain the only result? Is there any value to my efforts? Is all of this spiritual striving worthwhile?” (You can see how this can agitate a wound from a human relationship and quickly spiral in a bad direction.) Of course, the more we practice discernment as we oscillate between consolation and desolation, the better we become at accepting the former and rejecting the latter.
Here’s what a person’s thoughts might sound like when they’re preparing for desolation. Doing this won’t feel necessary, and it’s not a thought or desire that is likely to bubble up spontaneously. When related to service, it might sound like “I know I’m excited about this because it’s new. But I also know I will probably be tempted to quit at some point. When that happens, I’m going to ask God for help, recall this feeling of consolation, and remember that I am doing this out of love for God. I will not change course unless God reveals during consolation that this is His will.”
On p. 130 Fr. Gallagher says “For Ignatius, spiritual persons do not allow themselves to be borne along passively by the inevitable alterations of spiritual consolation and desolation. On the contrary, they live with constant spiritual awareness.” Also, “Ongoing, daily efforts to live with such spiritual awareness form the discerning person, living the examined spiritual life.” It’s sort of like the saying “You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
I’ve heard people express concern that thinking about oneself, period, is unChristian and leads to selfishness. I think there’s a distinction to be made. The ancient Greek aphorism “Know thyself” is truly wise and necessary. But knowing oneself can mean different things. We don’t want to dwell on our emotions and spend our time in our heads aimlessly. This is selfish and is a recipe for mental illness. Instead, we want to acknowledge, not dwell on, yes, our emotions, but also their causes, our thoughts, actions, desires– in light of Christ and His purpose for us. So the scope widens to all of who we are, not just our emotions and desires, moves past what we find inside of ourselves, and seeks holiness that will be evident in our outward actions. All of this is done not “in our heads” but in an ongoing hear-to-heart with our Lord.
An example of what it might sound like when a person is preparing for desolation related to prayer might be: “I feel so much peace at prayer right now. Thank you, Lord, for this restfulness. As your solider, fill me with the grace I need to be ready for the next trial, until I have finished the race to the place You have prepared for me.” Or perhaps, “Right now I am quite sure I could happily give Jesus anything He asks of me, without reserve. I love Jesus so much I almost can’t bear it! But I know that, like St. Peter, I am weak and will not feel these feelings endlessly on this earth. St. Peter, pray for me, a sheep, that when I experience weakness, I can cling to the Lord.”
Jacinta, can you tell us more about the importance of discernment and places in scripture that can help us?
Jacinta:
Of course! Spiritual Preparedness. Hmm. We know about Natural Disaster preparedness, Homesteading, “Off Grid” preparedness, Athletic preparedness, first aid preparedness, but do we actually take the time to tend to our spiritual needs? The physical is a bit more in our face and good because without it someone gets hurt. The spiritual side of things sometimes is not in our radar due to the fact that sometimes it can be more abstract and multifaceted. But it is true to say that with spiritual preparedness the same principle applies. Without spiritual preparedness we can get lost and lose our purpose and have a lot of damage/injury too. Without the spiritual, our whole being will shrivel. That is how essential this is. The mind/body/spirit are all interrelated and each affects each other but the physical is directed and has its source in the spiritual. Yes the physical is very much a part of our daily lives but God created us as finite beings with an immortal soul. The place where each part of our being meets the line can get blurred, but God is at the center of all things, and when we do not acknowledge this we fall apart pretty quickly in all the other areas. Even in secular circles we see the professionals referring to the higher power and spiritual side and in this can get lost in a lot of garbly goop with worshiping yourself and other humanistic things. But as Catholic Christians we can be specific in our language because of the Deposit of Faith and Tradition. We worship God and Him do we serve. I am merely pointing out that this truth is recognizable in all literature and that is where discernment comes in. St. Ignatius and the Jesuits were very good masters of looking at truth (with a little t) and directing it through the good, true, and beautiful to the Capital T Truth. They would find the good points of things and pull people deeper by appealing to the universal truths already known and held in common. St. Kateri Teckawitha comes to mind and the ministry of the “black robes” to her and the other Native Americans in our country, but they would do this in all their mission fields.
That means this is a bedrock principle in our own awareness. How to direct our beings to God using the good and the true and the beautiful to strengthen and encourage us. Let me get really specific and take you to a scripture that illustrates this point and take you even deeper in this relationship aspect of God, others, and ourselves. “All that the Father gives me will come to me; and him who comes to me I will not cast out. For I have come down from heaven, not to do my own will, but the will of him who sent me; and this is the will of him who sent me, that I should lose nothing of all that he has given me, but raise it up at the last day. For this is the will of my Father, that every one who sees the Son and believes in him should have eternal life; and I will raise him up at the last day.” - John 6:37-40
God does not want us to be lost but to be very close to Him. In previous rules, we have seen that the feeling of closeness depends on several things from our 1)own choice, 2)as an absence or presence of sin in our lives, 3)so that we don’t become overly attached to the gift, and 4)that we can learn and grow with or without this feeling. When we are in consolation or in tranquility we need to first allow ourselves to receive this gift. We cannot let any other thing come in the way. When the intensity lessens, we begin to examine what we can do for desolation. We ask for the grace to be able to carry desolation better when it comes. Our brains are more at rest in consolation and are more open to receive understanding of past desolations and consolations. With clarity, comes the responsibility and choice to carefully apply Ignatius’ thinking/examining/meditating aspect in all the rules. We have to choose to direct our thinking in consolation as well otherwise we will be completely blindsided by the arrival of hardship.
Father Gallagher gives the example of two people in a bus. One person is completely absorbed in watching the countryside and what he is doing and is loosely holding the guardrail. The other looks up from time to time to see and plan for the road ahead. A great curve is coming and the first person falls and gets an injury and the second holds the rail more tightly until the curve passes with no injury. This is very similar to what we have to do in the spiritual life and awareness. How can I apply my will? How can I strengthen it? What is the part we can direct? That is the part we attend to. Do I need more formation? Talking to our spiritual director or a friend to bring more clarity is another thing we can do. How about journaling? This is important in both consolation and desolation. Sometimes this act can bring our mind out of racing and trying to solve the problem to a point of tranquility so we can see things more clearly and then let go and focus on other things. Or like Dory “just keep swimming.” Even she practiced awareness when her brain got scrambled and by her acceptance and trust was able to discover many things. This brings me to the next verse.
“…and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. While we were yet helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. Why, one will hardly die for a righteous man—though perhaps for a good man one will dare even to die. But God shows his love for us in that while we were yet sinners Christ died for us. Since, therefore, we are now justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God. For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life. Not only so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received our reconciliation.” - Romans 5:5-11
Desolation kinda holds us in a place of “helplessness.” But with our awareness and curiosity awakened in consolation our muscles are conditioned/strengthened for further applying our will and keeping us from harm in desolation. Hope is a key ingredient that needs to be activated when we start seeing the pattern of God in our life as well as trusting the proper time for things. We can begin predicting times and seasons but in the end it is beyond our control in some ways and not in others. See how important discernment is? We will not be disappointed. Sure we might have some discouragement of “Really? Again?” but on the whole we need to have trust and not let desolation derail us. The stronger we become and the more experience we have, the surer and more peaceful we can become. Our home is heaven. Life in eternity.
“Let nothing disturb you, let nothing frighten you. All things pass. God does not change. Patience achieves everything. Whoever has God lacks nothing; God alone suffices.”
-St. Teresa of Avila
One further thing that Our Lord brought me to in prayer this week. That is the temptations of Jesus in the desert in Luke 4. Even Jesus in all His glory had temptations and dealings with the Devil in the desert. What actually happened? Read the story. There was fasting and prayer for 40 days. Christ was hungry. And then who came to lay it on even thicker to hopefully derail the messiah from the mission in front of Him? Yep. The Enemy. We can be doing everything right and guess who doesn’t like it? He will come. But God has control of this. With Jesus’ vision and determination nothing could stop Him. Yes, He is God, but we need to keep this story with us. Angels came to Jesus and we also have our guardian angels. The story ends with a little line that has been feeding me about the devil leaving and the hardship ending. Luke 4:13 “until an opportune time” Revised Standard Catholic Edition and “for a time” NAB. We won’t always be struggling even if it feels like it. When we are walking, this “time” is of the essence. It will end. And even if it is beyond us, it is our choice to grow in relationship and keep at it in our mission. In the next verse we see that Jesus returns in the power of the Holy Spirit to do His Mission. This struggle will strengthen and determine us if we let it.
If you have prayer intentions for us, so we can help you on the journey, email us at prayer@twoheartstruehealing.com or for more general inquiries or suggestions at twoheartstruehealing@outlook.com . You can also visit our webpage at www.twoheartstruehealing.com to stay in the loop or on Facebook. Go with God!
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Hello! I am a writer and podcaster looking to make a difference in the world of faith and mental health. I believe in the power of God’s love and wish to help bring you closer to Him. I am a wife and stay-at-home mom of three beautiful girls. We enjoy the adventure of homeschooling and living on our small homestead in the country. Other things we enjoy together are the great outdoors and hanging out with friends and family. We are active in our parish and community. www.twoheartstruehealing.com
