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A WOMAN WHO NEVER GAVE UP
Family life is never without its struggles. Many married women know the heartache of an unfaithful husband, the strain of a difficult mother-in-law, or the sorrow of a wayward child. Saint Monica experienced all of these trials—yet she never gave up.
Born to Christian parents around 322 in North Africa, Monica was given in marriage to a man of social standing. Sadly, he was a pagan and a man of unfaithful habits. To add to her burdens, his quick-tempered mother also lived under their roof.
Monica bore these challenges with patience and gentleness. In her neighbourhood she became known as a peacemaker. She was charitable to the poor and unfailing in her devotion to daily Mass. Her quiet example of Christian living eventually won over her husband and mother-in-law, who both embraced the faith.
Monica had two sons and a daughter. Her eldest, Augustine, was just seventeen when his father died. He was a gifted student, brilliant in rhetoric, but soon fell into an immoral lifestyle and joined the Manicheans, a heretical sect. Monica was horrified, but God gave her consolation in a dream: she was assured that one day Augustine would return to the Catholic faith. Strengthened by this promise, she prayed and worked tirelessly for his conversion.
Augustine, however, resisted her influence. When he was twenty-nine, he resolved to go to Rome to teach. Monica wished to accompany him, but one night he deceived her by slipping away and sailing for Italy. Hurt though she was, Monica would not be shaken off. She followed him first to Rome, and then on to Milan, where he had already moved.
In Milan, Augustine encountered Bishop Ambrose. Through Ambrose’s guidance and Monica’s constant prayers, Augustine gradually opened his heart to the truth. In 387, after long instruction, Augustine and several friends were baptised by Ambrose at the Easter Vigil. Monica’s lifelong prayers had at last borne fruit. Bishop Ambrose was to become Monica’s spiritual director.
The family prepared to return to North Africa, but before their journey Monica fell gravely ill. In a moving scene later recorded by Augustine in his Confessions, she said to him:
“Son, nothing in this world gives me pleasure now. My deepest wish has been fulfilled—to see you a Catholic before I die. There is nothing more for me to desire.”
To her younger son she gave a final request: “This only I ask of you—that wherever you may be, you remember me at the altar of the Lord.” A few days later, at the age of sixty-five, Monica passed peacefully to God.
What we know of Monica comes mainly from Augustine’s writings. He never ceased to acknowledge the debt he owed to his mother’s faith, persistence, and love. Monica’s story continues to give hope to countless parents who see their children drifting away from faith or entangled in harmful ways of life. Her example reminds us that patient prayer can succeed when all else seems to fail.
Even after death, Monica shows how love continues. Just as she asked her son to remember her at the altar, so we too can keep our loved ones close by praying for them each day and having Masses offered on their birthdays and anniversaries. In this way, love never ends.
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