What Does An Old Priest Do In Retirement?

There comes a time when a priest retires … well, as much as a priest can retire given the acute shortage these days. But a time does come when for reasons of age and or infirmity, a priest is no longer able to be active in parish life and when that happens, the priest moves out of the presbytery to begin a new phase of his ministry.

Some priests who retire, and are still in reasonably good health, hit the golf courses or pursue similar activities while acting as a "supply" priest (or a "Rent-a-Priest" as they are sometimes called) on the weekends in various local parishes. They travel all over the diocese to cover for other priests who are away on much needed holidays, or who are ill and need someone to replace them on a temporary basis. The only difference between a supply priest and a regular parish priest in this scenario, is that a supply priest has none of the usual administrative responsibilities a regular parish priest has. And if truth be told, it is usually the high amount of administration that nudges a priest into retirement rather than some health issue.

Such was my case several years ago when I retired. I was still reasonably healthy and mobile, so my "retirement" was almost as busy as before as I travelled all over not one, but two local dioceses as a supply priest. At the same time as travelling here, there and everywhere, I was also busy upgrading and renovating the family home in which I would live the remaining years of my life. When you are young, you are going to live forever. When you get older and you realise that isn't going to happen – not in this life anyway –you have to make some serious preparations for the future. Preparations such as converting bathrooms into "wet rooms" and removing all steps and all other such impediments that would prevent an elderly person from walking around the house. I also installed a stair lift to provide easy access to the converted loft area, and I beefed up the house security to provide peace of mind. All this I did in "retirement" while still supplying parishes on the weekend. So for those of you who think a retired priest simply spends his time on the golf course and praying the rosary in-between, this will be a wake-up call.

But even in retirement, you still get older, and slower. As the visits to my doctor become more frequent, the days when I could "leap tall buildings in a single bound and run faster than a speeding train" also recede into the past. Then there are all the little things that pop up unexpectedly, such as a heart condition getting worse; the onset of osteoarthritis and the discovery of type-two diabetes, along with failing eyesight that can't handle driving any longer. When the car goes, so does all the immediate freedom it brought, and public transport becomes your sole means of mobility. It is a big change in your life, and when osteoarthritis prevents you from not only genuflecting at Mass, but from being able to stand for the whole celebration as a priest normally does, then another big change occurs, and I had to come to grips with the knowledge that I could no longer supply parishes as I had done in the past. So now, my Masses are held at home in my own little chapel where I can sit and catch my breath when necessary without subjecting parishioners to horrifying sights of a priest wobbling at the altar.

Yes, I had to conclude I was getting old, and that life was changing, but while I was no longer visible in the parish, I was still able to practice my priesthood at home with a daily Mass, and surprisingly enough, by hearing Confessions. I suppose it should come as no surprise that since lots of people know I am always in and available, they can – and do – drop in at any time for Confession, and more and more frequently, as it happens.

So what do I do now with all the time I still have on my hands? Well, I could do a little gardening, but truthfully, the lad who comes every two weeks to take care of the garden does a much better job at it than I do, so best to keep out of his way and let him get on with it. As for house cleaning, well, I never was much good at that even at my "peak" so every two weeks a local lady comes in to rescue me and make sure that I don't end up living in filthy squalor. As for shopping, my groceries are delivered to the door thanks to the internet (along with any other item I might need), so I won't starve.

I may be living on my own, but I am never lonely. For company, there are other retired priests who are still relatively mobile, and who visit on regular evenings during the week, where we can talk about our bishop behind his back or simply watch recorded films or TV series on a big screen from a projector. These days none of us seem to watch live television any more, as none of us can stay awake long enough to find out "who done it". So watching a recording means we can always go back to the point we dropped off to find out who the culprit was! And on Sundays, we get together to celebrate Mass at our own speed. So life is still good.

I may be getting older and slower, but I still do things to keep my mind active. That gets more and more important, as there is far too much frightening information hanging on the walls in doctor's waiting rooms about dementia or Alzheimer's to simply rest easy. So having a challenging pastime to occupy and engage the mind is important. For me, that's flying, not real flying, but simulated flying.

Not many people know but way back in the days when dinosaurs roamed the earth, I was a young, bold commercial pilot who flew ancient WWII C-47 cargo planes in remote and otherwise inaccessible places around the world. I did this on and off over a number of years, in-between some military and government stuff here and there. So no, I didn't get fitted for a black suit and white collar right out of school like the original Men in Black – I actually had a "proper job" for years before I went to the seminary.

I did enjoy flying though – there were the challenges of flying in rough weather, along with the risks of varied "airport" conditions, that gave a thrill of satisfaction when things went right, and there was always that rush of adrenalin when things didn't go exactly to plan. Yes, flying was something I enjoyed. It required precision and a lot of skill in handling a big cargo aeroplane in difficult terrain conditions.

I made my last flight just before I entered the seminary, and although I was tempted by offers to join some remote dioceses in Alaska or Northern Canada where parish priests have to fly in and out of their parishes due to remoteness, I never flew again, and I missed it.

Many people know I was the IT director for my diocese before I retired, so I've been familiar with computers and computer systems since the days of DOS (yes, I did mention dinosaurs). And I was exposed to all the early computer games of those times as well, including "pong" for those of you ancient enough to remember. However, I paid particular attention to the development and growth of the flight simulation industry.

Flight simulation became necessary because of the costs of training pilots in real aeroplanes: try renting a Boeing 737 for a few hours to see what I mean. Or just see if your credit card would cover the cost of fuelling a Boeing 737 – oh and did I mention that fuel is bought by the ton and not by the gallon? So yes, you can see the immediate economic benefits from a computer generated flight simulator.

As computers developed, so did the simulation industry. It was expensive at first, as only the airlines could purchase such expensive "toys", but as the software got better, the costs became cheaper and more affordable. Add-ons inevitably sprang up: joysticks and even rudimentary pedals and other flight controls, along with additional monitors, to give a more realistic illusion to the flight, became plentiful and affordable. Simulation software became so good and so cheap, it was now within the cost range of anyone – including me!

I started "simming" (as it is called) about four years ago. I started out with a single computer screen and a cheap joystick. Today I have a whole room in the house dedicated to my flight simulator. (I know, boys and their toys!) There is a projector to show the "outside" view on a wall that acts as a screen. There is a main instrument panel and even a realistic Boeing 737 yoke and pedals along with some realistic electronic components to give me with a "touch" of real control surfaces. The software generates real live weather patterns directly off the internet and flight plans are filed and followed over the internet, just like they are in the real world. The illusion is almost complete – except I don't have any real motion, but one's senses can be tricked by the rest of the experience.

To complete the picture, I even have a personal instructor: a local parishioner who is a real Ryanair 737 Captain. He pops in from time to time to show me how he does it in the real thing, and then I set out to replicate his experience in my own little simulator world. Even he is amazed by the realism of the simulator. Best of all, I can travel to any place in the world and never have to go through any of that demeaning airport security.

So now I have a way to keep my mind challenged and active and away from the perils of dementia or Alzheimer's – the dread of anyone considered "elderly" these days. And best of all, I can fly again – something I never thought I would do again.

We all get old and when we do, we each face the uncertainties that ageing brings: limbs that no longer function as they once did; eyes that no longer see as clearly as they did when one was young, and each person will make decisions for him or herself as to what to do in the new world of "retirement". Some will choose to become a retiree in one of the elderly villages of Florida. Some may choose to sit around spending their time reminiscing about the "good old days", while others will spend it playing endless games of Bingo. The more active may play endless rounds of golf, perfecting the art of their swing. Me? Well, I chose a different path.

So, let's see: I can fly out of East Midlands Airport and arrive in Rome later this morning, and then let's have a flight to Zurich this afternoon before popping back to England in time for tea! Yes, that's the ticket!

Now you know what this old priest does in retirement!