Moral Relativism Continued: The Benefits of Suffering

You may have read a recent article that I wrote about moral relativism in which I lamented the rampant spread of views that reject fixed and authoritative moral truths in favor of “individual truths” which are subject only to the subject’s own views of moral reality and moral boundaries.

A by-product of the diffusion of relativism throughout our society is the culture’s attitude about suffering. I recently saw a picture/article about two single sisters who purchased wedding dresses and donned them for a picture with their Dad who is suffering from Alzheimer’s. Unfortunately he will probably not be present for their future weddings, and if so, will be unaware.

I am in no way criticizing the desire of these two young girls to share this precious moment with their father. I know that the onset of this horrific disease is a source of pain and suffering for all involved, both the patient and their loved ones. These daughters were simply trying to stop the passage of time, a painful process that would bring about the ever so gradual passing away of memory and life itself.

I do, however, believe that the action that they took is a powerful symbol of how our current society views the process of suffering. These girls were innocently trying to clutch onto a reality that through the providence of God was being taken from them. They were trying to assuage their suffering in a unique way. We observe a similar phenomenon taking root in a milder manner on our college campuses where one can witness students who are unable to face the pain of views and opinions decidedly different from their own and require “safe places”; and in a much more serious manner in the right to die bill recently passed here in California.

While I have endured a fair share of physical and emotional suffering in my own life, I cannot foresee how I will react when faced with truly excruciating and/or end of life suffering. I may be the greatest coward and complainer, this I cannot predict. The point being that I may not be the ideal, but I know the ideal – the example given to us by our Lord and Savior. Suffering is allowed by God and is part of our human journey for reasons that have been discussed by theologians for centuries, but cannot be answered definitively in this life. How we embrace or avoid this universal reality, however, is up to us.

It is naturally human to avoid suffering, but when this desire interferes with the divine will, it becomes problematic on several different levels. As Catholics, we believe that life itself is a gift from our Creator through the power of the Holy Spirit. God gives life and only He has the power to take it away. I believe that the end of life bill will result in more problems and evil than can be imagined, but in terms of suffering, it interferes with our journey to God. The suffering it seeks to avoid is part of the precious dance of grace between the Creator and his creatures. Let me share a brief story:

I had a friend named Jared who suffered from terminal cancer. He was a father of two young sons and this was an unfortunate tragedy. As Jared spent the last few months of his life on this earth in prayer, God was profoundly present to him, so much so that he asked our pastor if he could please speak to the congregation to describe some of the wonderful insights into life, death and faith that he was experiencing. While this was not possible, Jared taught me something extremely important about suffering. No matter what we experience and how painful it may be, God is with us and he has something profound to teach us. We may not completely understand the lessons of suffering, or even are aware of them on a conscious level, but they are an authentic reality of our earthly journey. Suffering is part of God’s plan and we have no right to interfere in ways that actively precipitate death.

As Jesus knelt at Gethsemane, knowing how much pure pain and torture lie ahead, he asked the Father if it were possible to avoid this suffering, but His will be done! Most of us do not know how much suffering lies ahead but we can hope to unite our prayer with that of our Savior: Thy Will Be Done! When we take the power of death into our own hands, we say MY WILL BE DONE! Let us pray for those who feel the desire to end their own lives, we walk not in their shoes. Let us pray that our country will enact laws in accord with the divine law. And finally, let us pray that we may embrace our suffering, great or small, as part of a plan that we may not apprehend, but is greater than anything we can imagine!