You visited me...

You visited Me...

My wife and I make a weekly trip to a nursing home a few miles from our home.  At certain times, depending on weather conditions, our schedules this may vary.  The reason for this visit is that my wife's mom lives at this particular nursing home.  She has lived there for three years. She has lived at various facilities in the past, but this is possibly her last leg of her life' journey.  These visits have become for us a holy habit.

One day in particular I was seated in the dining facility.  I had joined my wife who was preparing to feed her mom.  This task is painstaking and requires much love and patience.  My mother-in-law' mental and physical condition has made this a need for her.  While she fed her mom, I gazed around the dining area.  Some of the residents sat elbow to elbow, while others sat alone.  Nonetheless they were all waiting for their meal to be served.  A few can eat unassisted and others need to be fed by the staff.  My wife and I were making small talk and she remarked that 80 per cent of the residents there never have visitors.  This despite the fact that they do have family members.  I paused and thought about Matthew 25:36.  Christ says " I was in prison and you visited me."  Then soon after he says "I was in prison and you visited me not."  I believe that he meant that literally. We know that there are many ministries, not only in the Catholic church, but among other denominations, and secular organizations who do so. But what about visits for the people who are not in literal prisons with thick walls, steel doors and bars?

I suppose there are many reasons for not visiting a family member.  Distance may be a factor. transportation, financial barriers, work obligations or family and health issues.  Or maybe there is no interest or desire to do so.  Matthew 15:5 may have a clue. The tradition of Qorban. "Any support you may have had from me is dedicated to God."  Yet Jesus disputes with the Pharisees and the Elders.  He chastises them for the way they interpret and use this tradition.  So even today what can supposedly be for God turns into an idol for selfish use.  The gifts which God blesses us with are meant to be shared with others even non-family members. The gift of time can be used to spend with loved ones in nursing homes or assisted living facalities. Sadly it can be wasted on things of this world. As christians, we have a spiritual and moral obligation to fulfill these scriptures.  We must make an effort to visit these lonely souls. There's no rule that says these people must be related to us in order to do so.

When I first began going to the nursing home with my wife, I would visit my mother-in-law for a few minutes.  Then I would head to the waiting area until the visit concluded.  Then one day I was prompted to go to the dining area. I began to learn the names of the residents eating there.  If the staff was shorthanded, I helped pass out the meals to the waiting residents.  I began to stop and make small talk, say hello, or simply just smile as I walked by.  At times they responded woth joy and wecomed these moments.  I remember stopping and speaking with a lady who happened to be wearing a crucifix. We talked about the crucifix I was wearing, and we also talked about the rosaries we had.  Before I left, I asked if I could pray the Hail Mary with her.  She immediately said "Yes!" As I prayed, I asked God to bless her and the others there. No need to say, I had tears in my eyes.

We can make an effort to talk with the administrators of these facalities, talk with the nurses and carertakers. Ask where we can be of some help in relieving the lonliness. How quickly the years can erase from family members the sacrifices made by these people now alone. Sacrifices that made it possible to have better lives. Can we offer a sacrifice by walking through the door to "visit me"?