Peter Pan: Why the World Needs Him to Grow Up

Children are usually divided up into two categories; the stuffy ones who want nothing more to do with childhood and anxiously await the responsibility of adulthood, and the cheerful youthful ones with the wild imaginations and boundless energy. The children in the second category possess the certain juvenile joy that can only come from untethered imagination and lack of responsibility. This childlike awe is certainly admirable and we should all strive to possess this quality in some way, yet there are many aspects of childhood that we must outgrow in order to become who we were created to be. With his somewhat obstinate "I won’t grow up!" Peter is refusing to become all that he can be by desiring to skirt real responsibility in favor of the more desirable life without real consequences. In today’s society there are far too many boys who take this same stance as poor Peter. While certain things may make them more "grown up" in society’s eyes, it really lowers themselves to less than their potential as men in Christ. Far too many boys are settling for less and using Peter as a role model. The result: a society of lost boys. Lost boys who do not see nor understand the true measure and value of their masculinity.

Remember the iconic song “We’re following the leader”? That’s exactly what the lost boys in the film are doing (and the young Darlings too, when they arrive in Neverland). The leader they are following is none other than Peter Pan himself, the boy who won’t grow up. The younger boys clearly look up to him, yet Peter pays no heed to the great influence he has over the social and moral development of his posse. Peter is apathetic to the fact that his own boyish decisions are the example he is setting for the others and his own actions indirectly play a crucial role in the men who the lost boys will eventually become.

When Peter is given the pipe to smoke by the Indian chief, we can observe how the Darlings and the lost boys promptly follow suit without caution, even though this is likely something young Michael and John would never have considered appropriate on their own. In this same scene, Wendy is reprimanded for participating in the festivities and admonished that the role of a woman is to gather firewood. Peter goes along with this degrading viewpoint of women, and soon even Wendy’s own brothers are treating her with the same belittling attitude and lack of respect. Although he might like to ignore it, Peter is in a position of great power and accountability. The other boys are looking up to him and striving to imitate him. And with this, comes the responsibility to be a man worthy of emulating. Peter neglects to use his influence to spur his tribe on in the pursuit of true masculinity, but rather leads them down the same road of disappointing boyish immaturity.

For further example of Peters disappointing behavior we fly to Mermaid Lagoon. Who could forget how Peter looks on and laughs while the mermaids ferociously attempt to drown poor Wendy? Peter is quick to bask in the attention he receives from these flirtatious creatures, and blind to realize that being a man means so much more. Rather than assume the role of protector, Peter uses Wendy's grave plight as a source of trivial entertainment. Although he does later rescue Tiger Lilly, throughout the escapade he seems far more interested in the opportunity for swordplay with Hook than the actual well being of the damsel in distress. Much of the measure of a true gentleman lies in his treatment of women- something Peter fails miserably at.

"Will you be our mother?"

It always struck me as a bit odd how the lost boys and Peter had such a fixation of finding a mother. Throughout the film, we get the impression that if the boys merely had a womanly influence in their life, they would be much tamer and could achieve so much more (if you doubt this stance and would like a more extreme example, you could try reading The Lord of the Flies. That's a fun one). The boys seem to realize this necessity to an extent, yet are not able to put into words why they actually need a mother. So too do the lost boys in our society need the nurturing tenderness and gentle guidance that comes specifically from a mother. Although society may skew this need for kindness and tenderness as a sign of weakness, even the lost boys seemed to recognize that the care of a mother would actually help them in their pursuit of achieving true masculinity. So who will be the mother to these boys? You guessed it: Mary. As spouse to St Joseph and mother of Jesus, she knows exactly how to foster men into the most Christ-like version of themselves. Mary is waiting with open arms to lead us all closer to her divine Son and wants nothing more than to see her children achieve their fullest potential. Although Peter and his lost boys may not have realized just why they needed a mother, their fervent devotion to fulfilling that need can be an example to all men who may need a reminder to search out Our Most Blessed Mother for intercession and aid in their own lives.

The bottom line: As a woman, I do see the substantial pressures that society places on men. It's not easy to be a strong role model, and it's even harder when our culture is painting a skewed picture of what it means to truly be a man. Most of society tells us that Peter Pan is a fine example and that "growing up" merely means more freedom to do whatever you want. Gentlemen, you were created for so much more. So, if not Peter, who should our brothers in Christ be following? The Church offers a bazillion wonderful role models: the saints, popes, martyrs, and most importantly, Christ Himself. As a true man, you have the unique opportunity to stand in the position of Christ as protector of His Church, but assuming this heroic task doesn't promise to be easy.

So, to all the men who have already made the decision to assume this worthy mission: Thank you. Thank you, for discovering how to embrace mature masculinity without losing the faith, trust, and pixie dust. Thank you, for not falling prey to the pressures of society and taking the easy way of flying away from responsibility and difficulty. Thank you, for bearing it all with a smile, even if it means you had to fight a Captain Hook. Gentlemen, thank you, for proving Peter wrong. Thank you for growing up.