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Years ago I read some leadership advice that asked the question, "Who are you mentoring?" It suggested you list the number of hours you spend on each of the tasks that you do, and be sure mentorship is high on the list.
If you are not mentoring, you are not actually leading.
We've had a lot of readings lately about Jesus, the Good Shepherd, who leads his flock. If anyone knew good leadership, it was Jesus. This got me to thinking . . .
Maybe we are not a shepherd on a hill somewhere, leading a flock, but as parents, we do have a flock of our own that we have been given--our children. Even if they are adults now, our role as faith mentors still continues.
Now you may say that your adult children have lost their way. This is all the more reason to see yourself as their shepherd. Bishop Barron gave a SERMON last Sunday where he talked about the importance of a shepherd being attentive to his individual sheep.
Attentiveness doesn't mean controlling, or lecturing, but literally paying attention.
If a Bishop walks into a gathering of people, he must visit with people and find a way to connect with them. If he doesn't, then he is not truly acting as a shepherd should.
Have you allowed a wayward adult child to settle into their life, where they live in a bubble that does not include you?
It may be hard to break through the wall that has risen up between you, but ask yourself, "Have I allowed the distance in our relationship to become too comfortable?"
Have I lost hope that change is possible?
What's the STORY we have always heard about a shepherd going after the one lost sheep? He'd leave the 99 to find the one.
Maybe a card, or kind words, or even a lunch together would be a way to reconstruct a relationship, where you could again guide your lost sheep.
As Bishop Robert Barron mentioned in his homily, the Ministry of Presence is so important. It may be as simple as being present again to those who have become comfortable being apart from you and the fold.
How will they ever be led back, if you leave them trailing behind you, lost in the crowd?
Pray about it. Through Jesus, you, too, can become a good shepherd.
Janet Cassidy
janetcassidy.com
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I am a Catholic blogger who holds an M.A. in theology from Augustine Institute. I have worked in Catholic ministry as a Catechist, Pastoral Associate, Director of (parish) Adult Formation, Director of RCIA/Religious Education and am a Lay Ecclesial Minister. I am a former radio show host and former columnist for The Catholic Times. I have been married for over 40 years; my husband and I have three adult children whom we homeschooled. I am passionate about sharing God's Word as a speaker and writer, wherever God leads me.
