"Nunc Coepi"- Begin Again - Journeying Home to Indiana After Seven Years in the Air Force

I have been ordained a Roman Catholic priest since June of 2006. I will soon hit 18 years serving in the Diocese of Lafayette-in-Indiana (www.dol-in.org). In my seminary years, we had sporadic visits from military chaplain recruiters from all the different branches of the United States military including Army, Navy, and Air Force. One of my classmates at the time was in a program to become a Navy chaplain priest. Looking at his pressed Navy uniforms always intrigued me. How did all that work, I thought to myself. One visit involved an Air Force recruiter. I recall asking him some questions about what it was like to serve as a priest in the Air Force. Later, I would reach back to my home diocese inquiring about possibilities in serving my country in some capacity. The messaging back to me included comments like: "Don't ask, the bishop will say no" "Bishop has already let some guys serve in the military" and "Just focus on seminary and don't worry about it." Well, after talking with those recruiters, a seed had been planted in my heart that I would not be able to shake even to today. I would end up meeting multiple times with my Bishop asking him if he would let me serve in the Air Force. Each time I asked, he would say he was not able to let me go. My last time asking him, he was close to retirement and said that it was too close to his retirement. I realized this Bishop would not be the one to grant me the permission to serve. But there would be another Bishop and he would come to us very soon in 2010.

In 2010, I let the new Bishop unpack his things and get settled into his new ministry. But it would not take me long before I began to nudge our new Bishop as I had previously done with our previous Bishop. "May I serve in the Air Force?" Mind you, I had decided to pursue part-time military chaplaincy in the Air National Guard to be available for diocesan assignments. This Bishop listened a little more intently and more openly so finally after a few meetings, he gave me permission to serve in the Indiana Air National Guard. This is something I was blessed to do from 2012-2016. However, each year, I would meet with Bishop for a check-in on how the Air National Guard ministry was going. I would always share that I have really enjoyed it and wished I could serve in a full-time active duty role. After about four years of serving in the Air Guard, I met with my Bishop one last time out of about four or five times to ask and hopefull receive the required permission to be released for active duty ministry. Finally, my Bishop said he would consider it after I put my request in writing and then after he discussed my request with members of the presbyteral council for my diocese. In the summer of 2016, I was finally given the permission. By October 2016, I was on my way to my first duty station at Yokota Air Base in Japan.

Japan was a good first experience but did not go without its challenges of being far from my Indiana home with stressors that I had never encountered before in ministry. There were military members who struggled with suicidal ideations and North Korea had been test firing missiles over the north of Japan. These were just some things that brought to me stress and heartache. But I pressed on and did my best serving my country, my fellow airmen, and their families. I was fortunate during my time in Japan to be paired up with another active duty priest who had been serving already for many years. He was able to mentor me and guide me along in being a priest in the Air Force. This was a blessing and a grace. In two years’ time, I was already getting word that I would be moving back to the states this time to serve at the United States Air Force Academy near Colorado Springs, Colorado. I was thankful to be coming home to the states and was looking forward to serving our Air Force's future officers. What an honor to serve and even to be given this opportunity. I was very humbled by this assignment. I enjoyed the cadets I was assigned to serve especially those in the Catholic Community that I would take care of especially providing the sacraments and spiritual support. This assignment had its ups and downs, but I was glad to get the chance to serve there. This was short lived though after about 18 months. I was notified that three other Catholic priests were unable to fulfill a deployment tasking, so yours truly began the short one month preparation in January 2020 to deploy to Al Udeid Air Base in Qatar. I was required to be there by the end of the month. Normally, service members are given some time several months out to prepare with all the medical appointments, trainings, and preparations that are required. Thankfully, I was able to get everything accomplished and off I went to serve deployed members "down range" which is a big reason I joined the Air Force in the first place. The deployment with an incredible chapel team was positive overall, but COVID-19 did not help things and tensions in Iraq and Iran also made life very stressful.

After the deployment, I headed back to Colorado to quickly learn that "The Needs of the Air Force" required that I get ready for my next permanent change of station (PCS) to a base in the middle of the Pacific - Andersen Air Force in Guam. In October 2020, I was on my way to a new location for a new experience. I thought Japan was far away. Guam was even farther away. I quickly learned the normative expression for native Chamorro people: "Hafa Adai!" I enjoyed my less than two years on Guam. I was grateful to make some new friends specifically one priest from Wisconsin who served in the Navy at the time, the Archbishop of Agana, and another wonderful priest who was from Detroit. Every duty station I was privileged to serve at gave me opportunity to build for myself a new support system that normally included brother priests from all over the world. Andersen Air Force Base in Guam was challenging being so far from my Indiana home. I had already been praying routinely to God about how long He wanted me to be a missionary priest in the Air Force. Each assignment provided me with opportunities for serving as a priest and chaplain. After almost two years in Guam, I was more than ready to accept my next active duty assignment to Barksdale Air Force Base near Shreveport, Louisiana which would end up being my last. I arrived there in July of 2022. This location gave me the opportunity to supported the men and women who maintained the mighty B-52s or "Buffs." Barksdale was a high tempo base and was stressful for all assigned there. This base was also home to Global Strike Command and Eighth Air Force. I enjoyed supporting the Mission Support Group along with their six squadrons. I saw more trends and challenges with military members who struggled with military life, relationship stressors, and other challenges. The plaque of suicide was waiting at Barksdale as I had seen it at every other base. 

As I continued to serve my country at Barksdale, I continued to pray to God about how long He wanted me away from my Indiana home. I have read over the years that organizations that take care of their people will keep their people. Well, this priest and chaplain had certainly done his part in following in line with "The Needs of the Air Force." I got to the point where I decided I was done moving every few years and needed to return home to Indiana. I had some hesitation with my discernment and decision because it took a lot of effort and hard work to even be able to serve as an active duty priest and chaplain. It is not small thing to find a Bishop who will support you as I had known many other priests whose Bishops had denied their requests. But I followed the Holy Spirit and let my Bishop know my intentions. I received further confirmation when the active duty Air Force Chaplain Corps made the decision to not promote me to the next rank of Major even though my Wing Commander at Barksdale had given me the recommendation to promote and even said in his final comment: "Promote to Major Now." Again, if organizations do not take care of their people, some of their people will leave. Not promoting was a further confirmation that my time had come. I did realize how much I had enjoyed serving in the Air National Guard. Thankfully, my Bishop let me return to the Air Guard part-time so that remains part of my ministry and work today.

I am grateful to be home as of December 2023. Since returning, I have been placed in a transitional assignment in Peru and Logansport in Indiana serving two parishes with some other wonderful priests. I have also been given some time for healing, renewal, and prayer when I attended a 30 Day Ignatian Retreat near Boston Massachusetts. And, I was able to spend some time studying Spanish in Guatemala for four weeks just this past month. Now, I am enjoying parish ministry and serving again part-time in the Air National Guard. I await my Diocese of Lafayette-in-Indiana to give me a longer term assignment this coming July, so I am hopeful wherever they send me, that it will be a good fit for me and for the people I will be sent to minister to as a priest. On my retreat a few months ago, I learned about the life of Blessed Bruno Lanteri who founded the Oblates of the Virgin Mary. His phrase that caught my attention was "Nunc Coepi" which means "Begin Again." In context, it is a reminder to believers in Jesus Christ that one can begin again as often as is necessary especially if one falls or fails in the area of temptation and sin. I do not think that my leaving my diocese in Indiana for a time to serve my country in the active duty Air Force was a fall or a failure. I do believe returning home from Indiana after seven long years away certainly gives me hope and joy that I do get to "Nunc Coepi" "Begin Again" in this next chapter and next phase of my life as a priest and chaplain. I share all of this today in the Fourth Sunday of Easter what we also call Good Shepherd Sunday. I am thankful my Good Shepherd and yours Jesus Christ is with me and with us all. He never disappoints. "Nunc Coepi"