The Countdown: "Lessons" From a Mother's Heart to Her College-Bound Daughter, Day 8: Be Safe and Make Right Choices

We will be helping our youngest daughter, Grace, make the first-time move on campus in just a few days.  In all the excitement and chaos, how do I slow time to put into words she will hear, the things so important for her to know and understand?  Holy Spirit, come.  Fill my heart that I might convey these lessons that are monopolizing my worried heart; and permeate her heart to hear what You want her to hear. 

It is a natural inclination for each parent (especially your father) to protect their little girls.  From your topsy tails to your little bubbly, ballerina toes, the sweet, girly innocence was constantly gushing out, and we worked relentlessly to shelter you from anything that might threaten.  What can be an issue, however, is that because of this vigilant shield all their lives young women can be naive to the dangers that lurk in the world. Then, when suddenly free to live and experience life, there may not be a healthy amount of caution and restraint to make wise decisions about your safety. 

And so, (newsflash) I worry.  While I am so excited for you to have new experiences and meet new friends, I can’t help it as a mother to say the familiar words: “Be careful, sweetie.” 

I know it is tiresome for you to hear us question and verify all aspects of your agenda.  It’s in every young adult to want to be free; it’s in every parent to stress about the process.  You have the enthusiasm; we have the experience.  And it is the experience that gives us pause as we constantly and soberly understand the very real dangers out there.  The words that haunt me are the words: “If only.”  I shutter to think on the anguish of parents who use them to grieve those wrong decisions their children make that cost a huge price. 

Top on the list of worry is drinking.  I get it, it’s college.  I’ve been there.  You’re free!  You’re adulting like all the other “adults”, and adults drink, right?  So many things can go wrong when you are not in control of your faculties.  Intoxication is the root of all the “if onlys” that people look back on with such regret.  So, please, don’t drink to get drunk.  Don’t go anywhere with guys you don’t know.  Watch your drink! (You know the sad truth of this as our dear friend’s daughter was raped when a date-rape drug was slipped into her drink.) Stick with girls who understand the importance of looking out for each other.  One wrong decision can destroy your life.  Don’t make them. 

And please, don’t travel anywhere alone at night.  Ever.  Know your surroundings.  I know you are a level-headed young woman.  I am very grateful for that, but I can’t control the big city into which you are moving.  Sorry to be redundant, but it is at the core as a mother for me to tell you, “Be careful,” for the millionth time.  It is very difficult for me to let go and know you’re safe. 

You know what would really help me?  Stay connected to your guardian angel.  Listen to their promptings, their warnings.  If you are attuned to them, you will never be caught off guard. I know you are thinking this is silly, but it is not.  I have always placed you and your siblings under the protection of your angels!  Your Guardian Angel Prayer was the first prayer we taught you as a child.  Please, get into the habit of saying this powerful little prayer every day. 

Angel of God, my guardian dear.  To whom God’s love commits Thee here.  Ever this day be at my side, to light and guard, to rule and guide.  Amen

Hail, Mary…