Keeping the "C" in CYO Sports

One of the nicest notes I received from someone during my years of coaching at the CYO (Catholic Youth Organization) level was from a teacher at the Catholic school where my son attended.

“Coach,” it said. “Thank you for keeping the ‘C’ in CYO for the boys.”

In the middle of this time we call March Madness, where much of the country is focused on college basketball, it’s a good time to reflect on what things we can do to make sure we ensure that basketball, and CYO sports in general, keep their perspective in the life of students at a Catholic school and parish.

Full disclosure: I am not one of those people that think everyone should get a trophy. And as a former athlete, I still hate to lose.

However, as a parent and coach of middle school boys, I learned very quickly that the most important job of a coach at this level is not whether you win games or even championships, it’s whether or not you develop fine young men who parents, teachers, and the parish can be proud of for years to come.

To be honest, talent level at this age varies widely, and kids mature at different times, so in terms of basketball skills, you have what you have. Sure, one of the goals is to make a kid a better player from November to March, but the truth is, the majority of players will never play at the high school level, let alone college or the NBA.

So, can you develop character skills as good as developing a jump shot? And, in deciding that, ask which skill will take you farther in life?

Some simple things I learned over the years that I found helpful, and maybe you will too:

1. We started the season with every player signing a contract that listed rules for the team. These included the normal things like be on time for practice and games. But it also set rules for the way we treated our teammates and our opponents. And, most importantly, it listed the player’s priorities for the season in this order: Faith, then Family, then School, then Basketball.
2. Communicate early and often with the parents. Make sure they know what the priorities are for the team and the players. Ask for their support in those efforts.
3. We liked to have a team/family project each season to give back to others. Basketball season falls during the Christmas season, so we – as a team – would adopt a needy family or two from the parish (or St. Vincent de Paul) – and buy presents for them. It would be capped off with a pizza and present-wrapping party after one of the practices where the boys would actually wrap the gifts they bought (many wrapping for the first time!).
4. We prayed before every game. Sure, CYO teams always pray an “Our Father” before the game with everyone in the gym. But we would get on our knees in a huddle in the locker room and pray for each other, and to thank God for the opportunity to be together as a team before we went out on the floor. Just the players and coaches. It’s important for young men to see adult men praying with them and to realize that it is a blessing that we could share this time together.
5. I would try and spend time individually with each player during the week. Tell them something they had done well. Sit down in the locker room and find out how things are going, or how was the school work progressing? Show them, first and foremost, you care about them as individuals. As young men. Not just players.

At the end of the day, it really is all about the experience for the kids. It’s about how they look at themselves. How they treat their teammates and their opponents. It’s certainly not about the parents or the coaches. And it’s not about the wins.

Twenty years later, those CYO statistics are just numbers in a book. Building character, and providing a Catholic-centered experience that includes what happened on and off the court is what these players will remember.