Oh Spring

The frigid days run one into another like some great and dismal parade of dreary bad dreams on an endless night of woeful illness. 

The sun, when it shines, gives false hope of warmth.  It is scarcely possible to contain that bitter disappointment of a promise not kept; of warm rays that could melt the ice that cinch and bind one’s bones, only to turn cold and hollow- to be false. 

You shining sky-born orb!  You jealously, unsympathetically clutch all your great heat unto your breast like a cruel and selfish hoarder, clinging madly to a wealth of bread, a feast not shared!  You give off great light but no heat.  You tower above an orphaned child caught within your gravity; a captive of an orbit with no recourse, no force of will. Only longingly may he look upon your bounty of warmth and dream; Lazarus is the world in winter.  And bitter are the pangs of hunger.  And ravenous are the dogs of deprivation.  These his only company when the sun retires from the field, then winter plants her flag.   

Winter is cruel.  In the depths of her icy bowels one feels perpetually locked in a cycle of cold and snow, crushing upon the mind like bitter waves of tumultuous sea; rolling and crashing mercilessly upon a battered wooden ship.  A vessel months from shore, from land, from the fresh taste of air not soaked in salt spray.  And long while her crew, in ashen faces sunken and sullied, is starved for a morsel of respite.

Oh Spring, hardly can I wait for you to slip near my morning window and greet me like a long-lost lover who comes in secret to wake, with surprise and joy, one who is forlorn.  Enfold me with your arms, embrace me with your warmth, caress my aching limbs and melt the icy grip that winter has placed upon my heart; a steely shackle upon a slave- a shackle for which no key has been forged; for whom no liberty was ever intended. 

Oh Spring, I long for the soft rustle of new leaves, fresh and bright in the morning sun; your whispering of sweet tidings of warmer days to come, when we will move and walk and run and dance about to the lyrics of your warmth and swim in the currents of your breeze; and I can once more breathe in, the sweet fragrance of the blossoms that are awakened and drawn out by your nurturing touch, your tender kisses.

Oh Spring!  My heart longs for you! I am there at the wake of morning, at the deep, deep, sleep of night- watchful!  Though you are far beyond my sight’s horizon, I can feel you!  I know with undying faith, and a hope that will not yield till death darkens my door, that you are speeding your way to me.  The flare of a super nova could not hope to match your flight!  And so I wait. 

And in that moment you arrive, I shall rush headlong- not to greet you, but to throw myself into your embrace and immerse myself into your joy…and life!  There, I am renewed, rejuvenated, reinvigorated.

And when one last time, my eyes sleep and stillness settles upon my heart, I will pray the Lord my soul to take.  And if my soul He should keep, with joyful tears of gratitude I will humbly speak and say to Him, ‘I know you.  I know you joined yourself to me in every pain and every hurt; in all my waking and sleeping, in victories elevating and defeats pummeling.  But I did not hear you… or see you… or sense your countenance cast upon me.  Still, I give so much the thanks, and even more, for you granted me Spring’s companionship that I may experience days just as in the beginning; with new life, of green rolling hills, birds making song, creatures teaming the waters, land and sky and all good things.  You blessed me with a foretaste of the friendship of Heaven lest my countenance fall; despair plunder my heart.’

Oh Spring, I will joyfully greet you upon each new return, and lovingly keep your memory at each departure.  And when the last tear is wiped away and death be no more, I will not morn if Heaven holds me dear.  For, in that moment I feel the breath of God fill my soul, and the light of the Son grace my heart, my eyes shall awake, I will smile, turn, and greet the angels and saints.  And you and I will part no more.