Dorm Womb

I have a dear friend in our Bible study, and she shared with us something special she did for her three daughters. As each of them started at college, Cheri made a point to get them settled in their first dorm rooms and to create a bed “haven” for the girls. It was very important for her to give those girls a place of safety, beauty, and warmth. Cheri knew she couldn’t be there physically for her daughters, and she was happy for each of them to start their independent lives as college students.

But she wanted to leave a piece of their childhood and her history of mothering there in their dorm rooms. And for their family, that symbol was a cozy bed of crisp, freshly laundered (and ironed!) sheets that whispered “you are welcome, comfortable, and home.” Cheri knew that her daughters could come home at the end of a long day of classes, a fun party, a sporting event, or after pulling an all-nighter in the library and crawl into that bed, that nest, that haven, and feel cared for and loved. So as they snuggled deep under the covers, their sterile dorm room could become a nurturing dorm womb, a spot of safety to be alone and protected.

I have several friends who have high school seniors, girls and boys, and they are struggling mightily with the emotions. I am not there yet, but as I blink my eyes, I’ll be signing up for senior portraits and seeing the days fly by on the calendar until graduation, or my first child prepares to leave our nest. What Cheri shared struck such a chord that we can all create something special for our children who are moving into adulthood – whether their first dorm room, first apartment, first home.

And this idea of creating a nest can take place immediately in your home. Give your children a little space and seclusion – a well-made bed, a cozy chair in a nook, a fuzzy rug next to a bookcase. Leave little surprises to let them know they are being though of and are loved.

And while you’re at it, make sure you create a retreat for yourself. Do you have a prayer chair or corner or small room in your home that feels like home? When you sit or recline there, can you rest your thoughts and just listen?

How are you creating sanctuary for your children? For yourself? I look forward to reading your suggestions, and I thank you for the time you took reading mine. Peace, Catherine