Let No One Deceive You

There’s a special kind of Kool-Aid being passed around at American seminaries and I’m really not sure what’s in it, but’s it is lethal. 

Recently, a New York Times article went viral in which the president of a seminary in New York City was interviewed by a typically Timesian editorialist; I’m not interested in plugging either of them so I’ll leave both individuals unnamed. Allegedly a pastor, this seminary president denied the virgin birth, claiming that Mary’s virginity is only important to people who view sexuality as sinful. She denied the miraculous, stating that she does not believe in the power of prayer to do things such as cure illnesses. She denied the traditional notion of Heaven, calling it a “stick of candy” reward for a well-lived life “driven by a selfish motive.” She claimed that hell does not exist. Perhaps most dumbfounding and utterly heretical was her denial of the Resurrection itself, claiming that Christians whose faith hinges upon the physical Resurrection have a “wobbly faith.” 

Give me a moment to allow my eyes to roll their way back from behind my head. There, good; so, allow me to mansplain…I mean…explain; did I say that out loud? Sorry. Anyway, I could say this in seminary lingo, using all the meaningless terms that get tossed around daily by those hellbent on sounding theological but let’s be honest, they’d have no more meaning to me (or you) here than they do in the classroom, so I’m going to say this in simple, layman’s terms. To quote Joe Pesci’s character, Vincent Gambini in My Cousin Vinny, “everything she just said is…” well, you get the picture. 

This is the textbook definition of heresy. All of it. The incessant attempts by so-called Christians to naturalize Christianity, to make it earthly and profane and downright ugly is perhaps the cleverest attempt I can think of by Satan to attempt to destroy the Church from within. What frightens me about it is not that I think it could succeed; Jesus was not a liar and so we can rest assured that Satan will never win; no, what frightens me most is the fact that this movement is attracting quite a few individuals who seem to be enamored with the idea of setting an extremely low bar of morality and faith for the sake of creating a Church in their own image, rather than striving for greatness. Rather than looking to Jesus and Mary as the shining paragons of what it means to be fully human, these lost souls have bought into the lie that being fully human is to be vulgar and content with mediocrity and so they’ve created a new Jesus and Mary in their own image. The obsession with sex, genitalia and crude potty humor would be enough to make Dr. Freud give up his practice and move to the Cayman Islands to rid himself of all of it. It is pure narcissistic navel gazing and it is being passed off as legitimate Christianity at seminaries across the country and across the denominational spectrum. If that doesn’t frighten you, it should. 

If the physical Resurrection of Jesus Christ did not happen, let me say this to you as plain as can be: it’s all over folks. We’re all walking dead. The idea that in the absence of a physical Resurrection, “love” would still be “stronger than life or death” is some kind of Woodstock, peacenik, flower-power hogwash. Our entire existence would be devoid of all meaning. All of it. I always come back to William F. Buckley because he was an icon to me, so in true Buckleyesque spirit, I don’t want to insult her intelligence by suggesting that she really believes what she just said, but the problem is, I think she really does believe it. If your kids or perhaps someone from your church is in seminary nowadays, this is the kind of drivel being forced down their throats day in and day out and the results are simply staggering.

I’m entirely open to the possibility that the disconnect here is mine, but I don’t think so. It had always been my belief as a Christian that holiness is what all of us ought to be striving for; furthermore, I always saw priests and pastors as individuals who had an exceptional responsibility to bring people to holiness, to a greater closeness with God. A close friend recently confided in me that although she was still and always would be an avid Massgoer and believing Catholic, she was concerned that shoddy clergy members were the number one reason why people were leaving the Church. What she was referring to was clergy members who sow the seeds of confusion and license. Narcissistic clergy members—many of whom fall into varying degrees of sexual depravity, including but not limited to pedophilia—who seek to create a new Church in their own image with the shameless audacity to boldly blaspheme and claim that they are carrying out or reforming the message of Christ. Satan has begun his 15 minutes of fame. 

Friends, if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. If it sounds a little off, it probably is. If your pastor tells you it’s okay to do anything you want, you’re being lied to. If they tell you that you are your identity, you’re being lied to. If they're pitting you against your neighbor based on race, class, income or politics, you're being lied to. If they tell you that the Bible is just a book of moral stories, you’re being lied to. If you’re told that Jesus was killed for starting an insurrection against the Romans, you’re being lied to. If the Jesus they’re pitching at you sounds like he might be among the 93 Democratic-Socialists currently running for president, you’re being lied to. Leave your church immediately; you’d be better off having no church than a church that feeds you diabolical lies.

But fear not; there are churches out there that continue to preach the authentic Gospel. Put down the glass, don’t take another sip and just walk out. Look for the Truth; it is easy to find; He is Risen.