Beware of False Prophets; You Will Know Them By Their Screenshots

And Jesus said: “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their screenshots.”

Well, something along those lines. 

I mean no disrespect to clergy of any denomination when I say this, but as an insider who has worked for both Roman Catholic and Lutheran Churches, I can say this with absolute certainty: church is, as the old saying goes, like sausage; it’s great in many ways, but you really don’t want to see how it’s made. 

During my grad school years, I frequently joked with a priest classmate of mine that I was amazed that more people who study theology don’t become atheists. It’s not that there’s anything wrong with studying theology and I am proud of my alma mater and the priceless education I received, but the vast majority of the folks who take up space in theology classrooms can be quite insufferable; the material might make you more interested in God, but the people can easily send you running for the exits. 

Which brings me to the point of screenshots. At age 38, I’m not a kid, but I’m by no means an old-timer. I look, act and feel young because I keep myself in good physical shape but my line of thinking is, and always has been in line with my longstanding externally-attributed status as an “old soul.” I was raised to behave in a gentlemanly manner. I enjoy debate and I am a believer in saying what you mean and meaning what you say. I’m also not a snitch. If I repeat something that happened during the course of my day, I never mention names and I make every effort to avoid the possibility of anyone involved being “outed” through my commentary. I’ve always tried to behave like a mature, civilized adult in how I interact with people and if I know that voicing my opinions in hostile territory will lead to the creation a tense atmosphere, my general rule is to keep them to myself to avoid unpleasantries. 

That said, on neutral ground or “in my own house,” I am eager to take off the gloves to enjoy a little bit of verbal sparring in a spirit of sportsmanship. This is never meant to be combative; the fact that so many people today assume that if we disagree we must be enemies is pitiful. I am a competitive person; I always have been. As a sidenote, I am certain that this competitiveness will bring accusations that it is somehow un-pastoral; it cannot possibly be as un-pastoral as running a blog called "F this S" (censored) or melting purity rings into a vaginal golden calf, so no worries, I'll sleep well tonight. I have never tried to bully anyone or bait anyone into playing the game with me if they didn’t want to; for me, debate is purely for sport. So then, why would an adult choose to play the game, only to turn around and use my words against me like a petulant child? This is cowardly on a level that I simply cannot fathom because it is beyond my nature. Meeting me on my ground, engaging in open dialogue, whether in person or on social media, then taking everything back to the powers-that-be in the form of written statements or internet screenshots is despicably sophomoric. To bait me into a debate, knowing full well that you’re baiting me, only to turn around like the little snitch in grade school who pokes you and prods you until you say a four-letter word and then runs to the teacher is not the mark of an adult or a Christian. It is, plainly and simply, morally deplorable and vile. To lie to me and claim that you’re taking your beef directly to me, only to turn around and immediately report everything to mommy and daddy is insulting—not to me, but to your own professional and vocational integrity. It is an indictment of every last fiber of your character.

What have we come to as a nation? How has this become the mark of a civilized society? Especially in the academic world, the relentless obstinance in stifling ideas that even slightly veer from the prescribed narrative is not so much enraging as it is heartbreaking for someone who has long had a love affair with knowledge. As William F. Buckley once wrote, “liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.” Today’s progressives lack any real fortitude in implementing their utopian fantasies so they’ve resorted to guerrilla sabotage from within. After decades of toothless vacuity, they’ve become spiteful to such a degree that their new tactic is attempting to blacklist anyone who doesn’t think the way they do. They take screenshots of everything and cherry pick snippets of longer articles in order to demonize and vilify those who refuse to kowtow to their demands. 

Well, I don’t think I’m the first person to say this, but I am happy to reiterate this stance—a stance which is shared by many: I’m not yielding to your irrational demands. I’m not yielding to collectivists, globalists, socialists, progressives or any other “-ists” or “-isms” out there. I answer to God and God alone and the fear of screenshots or tattles by grown adults who can’t resist the temptation to behave like bratty children is not going to deter me from speaking the truth as freely and openly as I am compelled to. Grow up. You’re well within your right to accuse me of privilege or mansplaining or any other cliché, word salad, snooze-worthy fad-term that you’d like and I’m well within my right to sit here and smirk at your banal intellectual laziness. You lead your flock and I'll lead mine, but good luck leading a flock if you can't handle the mere concept of differences of opinion without shattering and phoning the thought police. Your job is to lead souls to heaven, not to shame them into buying into your very narrow worldview.

If you think this song is about you, you’re not vain; you’re right.